Marketing Audacity

Does Delta Airlines make us all out to be blithering idiots?

Their credit card commercial via American Express touts exclusive card member privileges for the first checked bag being free.  Really?  This is the best perk you could come up with?  This is the trump card?  Taking something that everyone remembers as being free to the unwashed masses just a couple years ago and marketing it as a world-beating premium?  It takes balls to make this the primary message.  Do they think we all forgot about checked bags being free?  The ad presentation is all pretentious too...it really pisses me off.  I'll be sulking back in steerage class with my carry-on bag, thank you...

Shake Weight For Men

Well, this was inevitable - wasn't it?
EVERYONE has seen this by now, but it's worth pointing out anyway.  The jokers at Shake Weight have taken the most ridiculous product available for women and now made it available for men. 

Now guys everywhere have access to the ultimate workout for strengthening the muscles used for furious masturbation.

Prepare For The Return Of Balloon Boy

Would you have hired Michael Jackson to work at your daycare?  Probably not.  But that's essentially what is happening now that the balloon property is being returned to the balloon family of balloon boy. 
http://gizmodo.com/5542073/original-balloon-boy-balloon-returned-to-hoax+creating-family
What's worse than the balloon boy hoax?  How about the endless hours of coverage about the balloon boy hoax that we were subjected to?  Yes - that was bad, but allowing the hoaxers access to the hoaxing device again is sheer lunacy.  If this ends up in a reality program we will have reached a new low in the areas of news coverage, law enforcement, and entertainment programming.

Community Is Gilligan's Island

It dawned on me as I was watching an episode of NBC's Community...that it is essentially Gilligan's Island re-born.  Submitted for your anlaysis:

Both shows have 7 main characters
Within those characters, 4 are men and 3 are women
The zaniness is limited to the confines of their surroundings
Both shows are funny (ok - not much merit here)
Here is it broken down by character:

So there you have it.
Einhorn is Finkle
Finkle is Einhorn
What's old is new again.

American Gladiators

Somehow this show made it to air in two separate series:

1989–1996
2008

The show is currently in hiatus, but not officially cancelled.  According to Wikipedia, it may show up at a later date on another network.  NBC still has an active page for it.

Its inevitable that this show will re-surface; and eventually it will turn itself into the Running Man, or the competition from Idiocracy.  We can only hope.

It's Effin Science

G4 is spinning off a segment from Attack of the Show called It's Effin Science in June.
http://g4tv.com/thefeed/blog/post/704128/its-effin-science-comes-to-g4-in-june.html
I am generally a fan of G4 and Attack of the Show, so I'm going to give it a try.  However, the title is sort of funny - and it made me think that this might be how we have to title courses in high school or college in the future...

Effin History - From the Past
That Damned Numbers Class
Friggin Phyzicul Edge-UK-Shin

And there would be field trips...

Bailouts Waiting To Happen

News came today of United Airlines and Continental Airlines "merging".  This will undoubtedly be the same type of merger where Delta swallowed up Northwest and became the worlds largest airline.  Now United may become the worlds largest airline.  Indeed both United and Delta are the size of the earth itself and it's merely a matter of time before they are failing and we will end up with the bill.

More incredible is how (up until now) Delta has been touting themselves as the world's largest airline in their marketing - as if that's endearing to the flying public.  Considering the size of these companies and the impact on employment, transportation, and other factors - what reason do we have to believe that these companies won't end up in the same scenario as GM, Chrysler, or the large financial corporations that were bailed out? 

If these companies become too big to fail they should be deemed too big to exist.  Delta should not have been allowed to eat Northwest, and United should not be allowed to absorb Continental.  Get ready for for less choice, higher prices, and the inevitable bailouts.  Thanks Wall Street!  This is going to bite all of us in the ass.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20100503/ap_on_bi_ge/us_united_continental
(Fat cat picture courtesy of a Gizmodo post about AT&T)

The Better Marriage Blanket

The Better Marraige Blanket fails on more accounts than it succeeds.  Sure, it reduces the potency of smelly farts, but they didn't even address these potential solves:

• 
  
  Hogging the covers
• 
  
  Releasing scents of strippers chocolate and roses to encourage amorous behavior
• 
  
  Enhanced drool protection
• 
  
  Sound dampening for heavy snoring

http://gizmodo.com/5527660/the-better-marriage-blanket-dampens-farts-to-save-lives-relationships

Toy Fails

Here's a follow-up to Candy Fails.  For those of you who have always fantasized about pumping Batman until he spits at you...the Batman water gun.  More on this and other key toy fails over at Cracked...

Backtacular Gluteal Cleft Patch

Wow - what an attractive name for a spectacular product!  This is made for the .000001% of ladies that like the comfort and appeal of ultra-low rise jeans, but are ashamed of the resulting butt crack cleavage.  Well now you can patch it up!  While your at it, get another one for the front side to represent the pubic hair you once had in that region.  This product would also work well for those interested in the tramp-stamp look that never found the drunken spring break ambition to execute it.

http://www.kimberlily.com/